Tears of a clown

no one know what i'm thinking except me myself.....
no one know what i'm doing except me myself......
no one know what i really want except me myself....
no one know me well & better except me myself....

just like a clown.....wearing a mask in front of all peoples....
the clown try to make people laugh & happy although the clown feel sad & unhappy.....

i'm good in pretending now a days.....
pretending to be cool.....actually i'm not.....
pretending to be strong.....actually i'm not.....
pretending to be i'm fine......actually i'm not.....
pretending like everything is good & okies.......actually it's not.....
pretending that i'm happy......actually i'm not.....
pretending to be someone that i'm not......

it's very tiring.... i'm tired trying to pretend to be a person that me myself also don't know.......
i pretend to be a different person so that no one worries about me anymore......
don't want those peoples who care about me keep on worrying about me.......
i'm really tired & exhausted.......
need one shoulder to let me lean on now.......

that clown i'm saying it's me..... i'm the clown now.....
no one get the chance to see the tears of the clown cuz the clown wouldn't let anyone to see it.....